Choosing a Private School in NYC: Five Tips for Families with Young Children

Choosing a private school in New York City for nursery, pre-K, kindergarten, or the elementary years can bring plenty of questions. What should you look for on a school tour? How can you tell whether a classroom will be a good fit? And how should you prepare your child for an admissions visit?

You don’t need to have all the answers before you begin. Your questions are a good place to start, and admissions teams are there to help. As you explore schools, here are five recommendations I often share with families.

1. Start with the child you know

It’s easy to start with a school’s reputation or a friend's recommendation. I’d start with your child. What brings out their curiosity? Do they jump into a new group, or do they like to watch first? What kind of environment helps them feel comfortable and eager to learn?

Think about your child as a learner and the environment where they could thrive. As you get to know schools, return to those observations. They can help you move beyond your first impression and consider what your child’s everyday experience might be.

2. Pay attention to the classroom moments on a tour

Having taught kindergarten, I’m especially interested in teacher-student interactions. Look closely: Are children engaged? Do they seem happy and comfortable? How do teachers respond to their questions and build on their curiosity?

For example, when a child offers an unexpected idea, does the teacher invite them to explain it? When someone hesitates to join an activity, how does the teacher help them participate? 

A school tour won’t show every part of the school day, but these moments can help you picture your child in the classroom. If something catches your attention, ask about it. Understanding why a teacher approaches an activity in a particular way can tell you a lot about the school’s approach to learning.

3. Ask questions that help you picture your child’s day

The questions you already have are a good place to start. What does a typical morning look like? How much time do children have to play and explore? How do teachers support different interests and learning needs?

If you’re considering dual language immersion, ask how children participate when the language is new to them. Having taught in a Chinese immersion classroom, I particularly enjoy this conversation. Children bring many different language backgrounds, and asking how teachers use stories, songs, routines, and hands-on activities can help you understand what learning looks like.

Ask practical questions, too. What are the age requirements for entry? What are the school-day hours? Are extended-day options available? These details can help you picture how the school would fit into your family’s life.

4. Let your child come as they are to an admissions visit

Families often ask how to prepare their child for an admissions assessment. Follow each school’s guidance, but for our younger applicants at Avenues, there’s no need to practice or rehearse. You can simply explain that they’ll meet some teachers and other children and try a few activities.

At Avenues, the visit offers an abbreviated glimpse of a typical classroom morning, with opportunities to work individually with teachers and collaboratively with peers. Children often have so much fun that they don’t want to leave! 

We’re getting a glimpse of who they are and their skills at that moment, as one part of our holistic admissions process. Some children are immediately comfortable; others take time to warm up. Sharing what you know about your child helps us, too–their interests, strengths, and how they approach new situations.

5. Get to know the parent community

As a parent, I know that joining a school also means joining a community. Ask how families get involved and how the school builds a partnership between parents and teachers.

You might ask to speak with a current parent about their experience. How do they connect with other families? Who do they turn to when they have a question? What has helped their family feel part of the school community?

A strong school-family partnership helps children feel known, supported, and that they belong. It matters that you feel comfortable being part of that partnership, too.

As you narrow your list, review each school’s application requirements, deadlines, tuition, and financial aid options. If you’re considering financial aid, ask about the process early, so you understand the steps and timing. Admissions teams can help you navigate these questions alongside your application.

We’re fortunate to have so many wonderful school choices in New York City. Take time to get to know each school, and lean on the admissions team along the way. We’re here to answer questions, explain the next steps, and help you think through your options. The process doesn’t have to feel overwhelming, and you don’t have to navigate it alone.

If you’re exploring Avenues New York, I invite you to attend an upcoming admissions event and learn more about our Early Learning Center.

Your NYC Private School Search Checklist

For your initial school search

• Start with your child. Consider their interests, temperament, and the environment that helps them feel comfortable and eager to learn.
• Review the practical details. Check entry ages, application deadlines, tuition, financial aid options, and school-day schedules.

On your school tour

• Observe classroom interactions. Notice how teachers respond to children’s ideas, encourage participation, and build on their curiosity
• Ask about everyday learning. Find out what a typical day looks like, including time for play, exploration, and support for different learning needs.
• Explore language immersion, if relevant. Ask how teachers help children participate when a language is new to them.
• Ask about what you see. Invite your tour guide to explain classroom activities and how they reflect the school’s approach to learning.

Before your child’s admissions visit

• Keep preparation simple. Follow the school’s guidance and, at Avenues, reassure your child that they’ll meet teachers and children and try a few activities—no rehearsal needed.
• Share what you know about your child. Help the admissions team understand their personality, strengths, and how they approach new situations.

As you get to know the school

• Connect with the parent community. Ask to speak with a current parent and learn how families connect with one another and partner with teachers.
• Stay in touch with admissions. Ask questions, clarify next steps, and reach out whenever you need guidance.